Day 1

Windiest night of the year, thus far, and the ‘van is still standing. Rich came back in the dead of night and we both slept like babies, woken only by the neighbour riding the clutch outside of the bedroom window. Oh no, sorry, my mistake, we haven’t got that neighbour any more 😉 It must have been the birds. There was much merriment this morning, over who was going to take all of four steps to make the coffee. I won and stayed in bed, gazing out of the living room windows. My big bro, Jimbillybob (as he’s now been named) and wife Loo rang, if only so Jimbo could get the ‘Hi di hi campers’ gag in. It was probably funnier if you were here, I’ve no idea how the rest of the conversation went as we couldn’t stop laughing.
But for the big one, who was going to brave the crapper. Richard went for the walk of shame, except there’s no-one here to see it. It’s probably a bit too much information, but this is the kind of shit they don’t show on Grand Designs, literally. Cue much more laughter on his return and the proclamation that he’s renamed it Dr Poo’s Turdis… Well, I laughed, especially when he gave me a rather vivid description of the following sequence of events. I won’t go into to detail but suffice to say, having broken my duck, he’s comically right. I didn’t shut the door though, it’s a cracking view of a Colman’s mustard field and all those chemicals can’t be good for you.
Today, steps for the dogs to get in and out of their pikey compound, erection of Ronald Raygun – an aerial bigger than one found at the Jodrell Bank, and, most likely, drunkenness.


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